Pregnancy Update

Today I had my 37 week prenatal appointment. Everything went smooth in the beginning as it always does. Checked in. Gave my urine sample to check for normal protein. Called back by the M.A. BP was great (120/73) Weight..ehh ok..I'm pregnant, so not a number I like but my gain is still very good. My appointment was just to check if I had dilated any more than my last visit (last monday). My doctor came in, we chatted a bit about after care, birth control, any of my concerns, and basically just caught up from the last time I saw her. (I've been seeing her Nurse Practitioner for my last three appointments or so.) I lied down so she could measure me and check baby's heart rate. By this time princess was moving all around. Her heart rate checked in the low 200's. Not good. My doctor said she would give me a stress test after we were finished with the visit just to make sure she was alright. (My nerves started rocking) She then checks to see my labor progress and she corrected my previous reading by letting me know I was more like 1 maybe 1 1/2 cm dilated.

Then..she tells me she thinks my little sweetheart is breeched. (Legs down). She leaves the room for a quick second and is back with an ultrasound machine. Sure enough. Her head is at the top of my tummy. (OH NO! I want to cry) She again checks her heartrate and everything checks out normal. She must like doing her gymnastics in the morning.

We then talk about my options.

Option number one:: I can schedule a cesarean for when I reach term and if by chance she turns down on her own then I will just be induced to have her vaginally.

Option number two:: I can go in tomorrow morning for a version. Where the doctor hooks me up to an IV and tries to manually (by pressing on my belly) move the baby to turn down. There are some risks by doing this. There is a small percentage that my water could break, there's a small percentage that the umbillical cord will become pressurized, a small percentage that my placenta will tear, severe cramps, heavy bleeding (pretty much there's a chance for things to go bad). All of which if they happen will cause me to have an emergency cesarean. However, if sucessful then I will deliver vaginally whenever she decides to come.

It always seems like when you're in the doctor's office you're questions and concerns leave your head. You can't think clearly when you have just been told this type of news.

What to do..what to do..

I went ahead and scheduled to check in at labor and delivery for the version and if later in the day changed my mind, I could always call and cancel. I want so badly to deliver her the way I'm supposed to. I want my body to listen to what my mind wants. I want my baby to understand and flip on her own so I don't have to go through this crazyness. I want all my fears and concerns to leave my heart and just have everything go as planned.

After talking with my husband (who would support any decision I made), my sister (who's advice I hold very dear), my mom (who brought up very great points), my mother-in-law (who consoled my concerns), and a doctor who I work with who is an ex-obstitrician (who set my mind at ease and made my decision more clear), I knew what I wanted to do.

I went ahead and canceled my version for tomorrow morning. I didn't want there to be any risk for my little one. A c-section is not on my list as it is, so to think that I could possibly have emergency surgery..NO THANK YOU! 

I emailed my doctor to call me so we can schedule my cesarean. In my message, I mentioned how I would like to schedule it as far from my due date as they would allow, to give her as much time to turn on her own as possible. I have yet to hear from her but my next appointment is on May 23 so if I don't talk to her before then, we'll discuss it at that visit.

bigger concerns:: I'M SCARED!! 

When my doctor told me that she was in a breech position I cannot even begin to explain my feelings. It's not supposed to happen like this. This is not how I planned it. I know that this isn't the end of the world but surgery scares the day lights out of me. I've delivered a baby before, I know what to expect. I know how it goes down and to think that I don't know what could happen is beyond my comfort zone.

I know that worse things could happen and I shouldn't complain. However I can get my daughter out allowing both her and I to be healthy, I'm all for it. It just is unsettling to know that when you become pregnant, you think that after 12 weeks you have the green light. Things will run smooth from here on out. What you don't think of is how you have absolutely no idea what goes on inside your belly. Scary stuff. You think your baby is in the safest place and there's no danger. But the reality of it is YOU. DON'T. KNOW.

So for now I will try to think positively. Not focus on what my future delivery could be like. I will talk to my baby girl into flipping for momma and see if that works. I WILL relax more, so I don't cause unnecessary stress to her.

I just want a happy, healthy, beautiful daughter, delivery and recovery.